Wanting to save a few baht and avoid the hassle of the taxi line, I decided to check out Mr. T's Taxi service as recommended here on the forums and emailed a few days in advance requesting the 1000bt BKK-to-Patts special.
When I stumbled out the arrivals gate into the throngs of people waiting for their loved ones or their customers I saw this mid-20s Thai girl holding a sign with my name on it.
Haha... I have to say, this was a first for me (seeing my name on a sign) and I got a chuckle out of it.
I said hello and asked her name. She replied "Sa-noopy"
and indicated to follow her. I assumed she was just the greeter and would be taking me to your typical Toyota taxi piloted by your typical tanned and surly Thai dude driver.
I have to admit, I was a bit surprised when we approached a car in the parking garage and she opened the trunk. "Are you the driver?" I asked. She said "yes" and gave that cute little nod of the head so common with Thai girls.
The car was a styling Honda of some sort and very nice inside and out. I got in the passenger seat and looked around. I noticed a large decal on the rear window: Snoopy. I had another chuckle about that.
I tried to engage Snoopy in conversation but, unfortunately, her English wasn't that good and I only know a few words of Thai. Not much talking but she was pleasant enough. She told me Mr T was her uncle. Apparently it is somewhat of a family business.
Snoopy was a good driver, keeping a nice speed but not getting even close to reckless. I was particularly impressed when she took a detour avoiding that spot in the highway that typically clogs up and turns to gridlock. She had a DVD player installed in the car and so I watched some counterfeit music videos to pass the time. Before long we arrived in Patts and she dispatched me to my hotel on Soi 8.
I asked her if she could be my driver when I went back to BKK and was hoping she would give me her mobile. As it was, she seemed shy and just said "maybe can be your driver, up to my uncle."
After a few days of fun in Patts it was time to head to back to the Big Mango to meet up with a friend and continue my adventures in LOS.
I emailed Mr T about my plans to return to BKK and asked if I could have Snoopy. He simply replied that a driver would meet me at my preferred time and didn't say one way or another who it would be.
My driver arrived promptly at my hotel at the specified time. I was disappointed to see it wasn't Snoopy and that the car was your typical down at the mouth Toyota. The driver was another mid-20s or so female, however, so that was cool (or so I thought).
This driver was a bit more outgoing than Snoopy and I engaged her in a bit of conversation as we headed out of town.
I was in the back seat and the car was a bit hot so I politely asked her if she could turn on the A/C. She said it was on as high as it could go. However, from where I was sitting, I could see the light for the A/C button wasn't illuminated. I wasn't surprised as more than once I've known taxi drivers to not use the A/C in order to save gas.
I didn't want to jump to conclusions. Maybe the light for the button was broke and I knew that once we hit the higher speeds of the highway the A/C would work better. Or maybe not. We got on the open highway and the car was still somewhat stifling. I asked again if she could turn up the A/C.
I was surprised at what happened next. In an argumentative tone she insisted the A/C was on and in a raised voice asked me if I wanted a different car. It was like a switch had flipped. The woman was batty.
I decided to call her bluff and replied "yes, I would like a different car." So she swerves over to the side of the road, parks, and calls someone. After some Thai yammering, she hands her mobile to me. I then spoke to who I can only assume was Mr. T. I tried to explain that the car had no A/C. The person on the other end of the line didn't understand.
I tried a bit more and it just turned into one of those stupid farang-thai conversations that wasn't going anywhere so I just hung up and said "mai pen rai" and the psycho-girl resumed driving.Only now, instead of driving at a normal pace, she was driving at very high speeds and was weaving recklessly in and out of cars. I would be a liar if I told you I wasn't frightened. The last way I want to leave this world is at the hands of a moody, fired-up, psycho-Thai chick.
Fortunately, her maniacal driving settled down after a few minutes. Nonetheless, I took a Xanax to settle my nerves and keep me calm for the remainder of the drive. 
The rest of the trip was uneventful. The car cooled down a teeny bit but was still a bit hot. And not another word was spoken aside from telling the psycho-chick where to drop me off.
When she dropped me she demanded an extra 100bt for tolls. I had understood it was 1000bt inclusive but at this point I just wanted out of the car. I gave her the money and looked forward to checking in to my hotel and downing some Singhas.
All things considered, I would say Mr Ts Taxi service is a toss up. Just depends which driver and which car you get. Damn that chick was nutso!
